Friday, March 25, 2016

Ultra-Sensitive Blue Ray Empath.

As an ultra-sensitive Blue Ray Empath, I feel my own and therefore my fellow man's existential angst. I have always felt others' pain, I have felt always for the downtrodden. I began to have a glimmer of the perception of this angst and my empathic response to it when I first heard Bobby Goldsboro's song "See The Funny Little Clown" on the radio in the 1960's. The words, excerpted  here, stuck with me all my life:

"See the funny little clown
See him laughin' as you walk by
Ev'rybody thinks he's happy
Cause you never see a tear in his eye
No one knows he's cryin'
No one knows he's dyin' on the inside
Cause he's laughin' on the outside
Mm no one knows except for me
Because you see
The funny little clown is me"

I also remember seeing the famous clown, Emmett Kelly who was with Ringling Bros. Barnum & Bailey circus in 1955 when he portrayed his famous depression-era hobo/tramp character that would appeal to the sympathies of the audience by sweeping up the circus rings after other performers. He tried but failed to sweep up the pool of light of a spotlight.

Marcel Marceau, the greatest and world's most famous mime was a performer I loved and saw perform live several times in the 1970's  and also struck a chord in me. His alter-ego of his character Bip was an Everyman that reflected the comedy and tragedy of all mankind.

Lastly, while in High School, I read Albert Camus' "Le Mythe de Sisyphe" that tries to make sense of "man's futile search for meaning, unity and clarity in the face of an unintelligible world devoid of God and eternal truths and values. Does the realization of the absurd require suicide?" Camus compares the absurdity of man's life with the situation of Sisyphus, a figure of Greek mythology who was condemned to repeat forever the same meaningless task of pushing a boulder up a mountain only to see it roll down again. In Camus' view, "the struggle itself is enough to fill a man's heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

All of this is to say that as an ultra-sensitive empath, I felt the existential angst in my fellow man as sung by Bobby Goldsboro, performed by Emmett Kelly and Marcel Marceau and written about by Albert Camus. My answer was not apathy. My answer was and still is, compassion, that is, my feeling FOR the suffering of others. My feeling to want to allay this suffering, not prolong it and not cause it. This is not only because I feel it but also because I am it too.

Compassion is the answer to the world's misery, not indifference.

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