When I first starting perceiving God, Spirit inside and outside myself, it felt like the big, bad boogeyman. I was very scared of what I was perceiving. It was just too strong for me as a five year old child and I could not deal with this power yet. It took me many years to calm down and recognize, accept, allow and process this immense power, this energy called God. For me, it was a deep and visceral experience. It was not preconceived notions, ideas or beliefs of God but an experiential, mystical occurance that was very powerful. I had to grow into it and when I did, I discovered that God was not the boogeyman nor was God the God painted by any sacred texts including the Bible, meaning God was not vengeful and did not have any human attributes at all.
I discovered that all the words that had been used to describe God were human words that were opinions of what a human experienced. It was not MY experience. My experience differed from what was written in the Bible and I decided to let go of what was written in the Bible. That material in it’s description of God did not resonate with me because it portrays God as vengeful. Why didn’t it resonate with me?
The depiction of God in the Bible did not resonate with me because it places human qualities on God. God, I discovered is not human, has no human qualities whatsoever and trying to put human qualities on God is foolish and misguided.
Man has been trying to figure out what God it since the dawn of time on Earth. I say, stop trying to figure out what God is and start being God for without man’s consciousness of God, there is no God. Without our conscious awareness of God, we can’t have this conversation because we would not be perceiving God in the way we do.
The way I perceive God is as a part of who I am. God is me, is in me, as is everything in my reality. God is not easy to handle as God is a powerful force but God is not the boogeyman. God is not some being who gives and takes away. God just is. God is Spirit having a human experience. God is within us and as such, God is not to be feared. God is to be loved, appreciated, to have gratitude for and to be thankful for. God is not my grandfather giving me things and taking things away. That’s just
fakery. I do not ask God for things. I thank God that I already have them.