Many humans have a deep seated need to control others, to seek approval, approve of others and to judge others. Why must we talk of this? This issue has to be raised again and again because it is the cause of much suffering in the human family. This human need to control, approve and judge is the basis for much of the murder amongst humans, wars, intolerance, hate, fear and greed. Life itself is not cruel, humans are in their relentless need to control, approve and judge.
Do you want happiness in your life? Do you want peace in your life? If so, you must, at all costs, relinquish your need to control, approve and judge yourself and others.
Why is this not an easy task? Relinquishing your need to control, approve and judge is nearly impossible because your persona/psyche/ego loves to operate through comparison and competition. It sees itself as a contruct to eat or be eaten. It loves to have power over, to be grandiose, to be first, the best, the king of the hill at all costs. Therefore, the attendant suffering on Earth.
May I suggest that in order to achieve balance, peace, happiness, harmony and integrity in your life that you relinquish your need to control, approve and judge. Simply stop doing it at every turn.
When you stop this nonsense, you will find yourself much more in love with life. I did and continue to do so and I'm living a very happy life.